Relationships in the Limelight

Have you noticed that your relationships have taken up more of your time lately? Has a hidden misunderstanding come out? Have you discovered a conflict in an unexpected place? If this is true, it's because the planets of relationship have been speaking more loudly to us lately.

Mars and Venus are the planets of relationship.
These two planets have been highlighted for most of this year--Mars from mid March-early June and Venus from the end of July-mid September. When they are our featured attraction, we review and refresh our relationships--all of them, from our partner and family, to bosses, co-workers, employees, and friends.

The Mars period may have revealed new problems.
Hidden issues may have come up which were not easy to resolve. We may have become angry or fearful, and we may have seen others overreact as well.

Dave and Jill were living together. In late January, they began to argue. Dave had been the "reliable one", while Jill was not working or even trying to get a job. For a few weeks they ignored the problem, but in mid March, they began to argue about it again.

Mars's gift to us is being able to see the problem.
When Mars is in focus, there may seem to be more problems than solutions. We may not appreciate it at the time, but this is the gift of Mars. Until we know there is a problem, we can't solve it. Once we see it, we can work things out.

The Venus period gave us an opportunity to find answers.
When Venus was in focus, we had the chance to clear our relationships. During this "relationship renewal" period, we saw what is and is not working. We may have wanted to change our commitment level or our agreements with each other.

In late August, Dave and Jill realized what they could do. Jill needed to go to school to prepare for work she would enjoy and stick with. Dave agreed to help her financially, and she agreed to get a part-time job to contribute.

Looking back at the past can help us grow.
When Mars and Venus were highlighted, Dave and Jill got a chance to re-balance their relationship. They took a major step forward, but they will still have to look back from sometimes to make sure that they continue toward their new goals. They can expect to keep this focus until these planets are highlighted again, in the spring and summer of 2001.

Our relationships can grow by looking at the recent past.
When Mars and Venus are in focus, we are able to bring greater harmony to our relationships. Our attention is drawn to the weak areas. No matter what has happened during this time, continue to work with what you have learned. We can still learn from Mars and Venus after their time in the limelight has passed.

Mars is the planet of action, assertion, and aggression. It is associated with excitement and anger. Anything we do which involves vigorously moving our bodies, from sports to physical labor or war, is Mars's domain.

Venus is the planet of love, attraction, and beauty. Through it we experience what we value--ourselves, our partner, our children, parents--and material possessions as well, from money to chocolate to a mountain panorama. Venus also represents our self-value, self-worth, and self-love. Our self-worth also has an impact on our other successes as well, including financial and relationship.

A planet requests more of our attention when it is emphasized in the heavens. One of the times it is emphasized is when it is retrograde, or appears to be going backward (that is, from a later degree to an earlier degree in the zodiac). Every planet but the moon (and sun) retrogrades regularly. The planets don't really go backward; they only appear to do so because the earth is not in the center of the solar system. Mars retrogrades the least frequently of all the planets, about every two years. Venus retrogrades a little more often, every 18 months or so. All the others retrograde once a year, except Mercury, which does so about every 4 months.

The Mars period (its retrograde) lasts about two and one-half months. During the Mars period, we usually feel like we should use more restraint, but we usually feel like acting out or fighting back. We can feel frustrated, even powerless. However, Mars is really asking us to focus more carefully on how we use our energy, especially in our relationships.

The Venus period (its retrograde) lasts for about six weeks. During the Venus period, the agreements we have with others come into focus. We have agreements in all our relationships. For example, we may agree with our partner that each will pay certain bills; or with our son, we may agree that, if he does his homework by 7, he'll get to watch his favorite show. We may also make major money decisions, to make large purchases or long-range plans for managing our finances. This is also a time to look inside and see what ways we may want to take care of (love) ourselves better as well.

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Copyright 2001 by Terry Lamb

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